Depression

If you haven’t lived it, read the following. Sometimes just understanding is all that some need to start healing. Trust me on this one please!

“The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. Yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don‘t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.

David Foster Wallace

Pliers and a Hurricane

It’s been awhile since I used them but these are safety wire pliers. They’re used to twist a strand of wire as to secure a bolt, or many bolts from unscrewing themselves on a lot of things but as far as this post goes it refers to airplanes. F-15s in particular… with the exception of my Ducati 996 which loved to unscrew its oil drain plug.

Now not to pat myself on the back too much but my safety wire work was pretty darn good. Similar to an elementary school student mastering the pencil sharpener. I always did it by hand but everyone thought I used these. I’d keep going but seriously, to see a row of castellated bolts all tidied up with wire, well it really is a thing of beauty.

At my separation party from the Air Force, I was handed these as a gag gift. The very ones I never used from my tool box.

I smiled when I rescued them from the flood water.

It’s the simple things for me.

Part Time

Long story but I work part time. Lack of being a productive member or society was wearing on me greatly.

Well the shop is just over a 5 minute walk from my front door. I have 3 of the most excellent bosses. He, She, and their dog. He’s an abandoned stray they took in (did I mention how excellent they were).

You could give me a brick of gold and I wouldn’t be as happy.

Some people I know are just exceptional. The way they treat others is proof!

Years Ago…

when life was becoming very difficult for just about everyone I knew and loved, I had a recurring dream.

I dreamt that I had loaded everyone’s pain, sickness and grief into my kayak and paddled west never to be seen again.

The circumstances have changed a little but everyone’s pain I feel again and I still have the same kayak.

If dreams could only come true!

Very Satisfied

Across our canal (the ditch) as I call it, we’ve had an issue with some dogs barking. Now no one loves a dog more than I but these two were stuck on bark.

I left a note on their door asking them to call me ASAP. A few hours later I got a call. After a few minutes we were apologizing to each other. Him for his dogs, me for my bitching.

This is social media. In person!

I hope to have he and his wife over for dinner someday. They seem like great humans.