He once wrote:

A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.

Right now writing this, well it’s the end of a very special day for me. it’s my first day of getting serious about retirement and seeing glorious results!
No kidding. This has been the happiest, most carefree day I’ve had in 4 years. No deaths, thoughts of cancer, or news. No flu’s, no pains from radiation, no depression, anxiety, work issues, or even restlessness. I didn’t even have a nightmare this morning. Just peace with many small doses of pondering. I swear I even smiled once for no reason!
I was at peace with everything and everyone. I took Bulleit out to the end two hours early to watch the sunset and sniff people. I’ll let you figure which did which.
I could get used to this you know.

Is this what it feels like to be normal? I don’t remember.

Me? I’m still in the process of retiring. But dealing with customers of, and the manufacturer themselves in the process of me shutting things down?
Well Let’s just say once again, I’m hearing the dull scream of another company that’s slowly dying an agonizing death.
I have great sadness as I know there are many employees that will soon be out of a job if they don’t jump ship as well and soon!

Well my…
Life V1 program expired and isn’t supported by the manufacturer anymore.
I thought Life V2 was going to be a big hit and it was. Hit by a virus resulting in several crashes and nearly a few BSOD’s.
So, Life V3 is rolling out soon and so far it appears it might have legs. Long and strong ones too. My business of 20ish years is being shelved (it too isn’t supported anymore) as I write this and although that process is taking a little longer than was expected, the weight lifted off my shoulders has given me a feeling like I haven’t felt in well over a decade.
Getting ready hopefully for much salt water, serenity, Nature and in general… a helluva good time I hope!
I ran into this little resort this past weekend. I already booked it for a night here soon. Amenities are few but it has everything my mind needs right now, which isn’t much!

it was yesterday. Sitting in middle school wondering how life would end before I was 50. Didn’t know how or wish it upon myself, I just knew at the time 50 was damned old and I’d never make it to that.

Well here I am. 65 and putting the wheels of retirement into high gear. Letters are being written to current and past customers. Others are being composed to the manufacturer of the products I’ve represented for nearly two decades. To many of my customers who are now, and have been my friends for so very long… you will be missed but never forgotten. To the manufacturer? I wish you would hadn’t forgotten who put the dinners out for you. It wasn’t your work, it wasn’t my work, it was and will always be the Mr Vails, the true friend Ken in AZ and so many others. You forgot them and shame on you. And I wasn’t able to convince you otherwise. Shame on me. You guys were chasing the almighty dollar. I wish I’d been more convincing. Time will prove me right or wrong. Talk is always so cheap.

So I’m off to settling down a little mentally but hopefully speeding up a bit physically. Packing the bug out bags for new adventures without the desire for the dollar, but for peace and understanding of Mother Nature, others and maybe a bit of myself in there somewhere.

And no. I didn’t forget my friend Bulleit for he would never forget about me.

I posted to a friend not 30 minutes ago that I was sick and tired… of being sick and tired. I wasn’t kidding or lying.

Tomorrow after the family shindig, my kayak is getting loaded for somewhere that at this time is completely unknown.

PLB, lights, VHF, camera, GoPro are currently getting a charge. May Mother Nature grant me many surprises.

Yeah, one word pretty much describes it all. These past 2 years, I’ve just experienced a bit too much for me to handle. Covid, cancers, cures.

I’ve seen too much pain, experienced too much unhappiness.

Well I was wondering when this day would come. It wound up being on my wife’s Birthday Eve.
Work, a living as I’ve known it for nearly two decades has come to a rather abrupt end… but in all honesty, I’d seen it coming. Sadly, I don’t have much sorrow regarding my decision an hour or so ago. I wish I did.
I did the best I could with what I had to work with. It’s come to a point though I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to accept responsibility for others actions, or should I say inactions any longer.
A sad ending really. I wish I had the words to express my thoughts.

It’s been a wonderful ride that has offered myself and my family many things. The people out there, my customers and friends, have been fantastic.

I simply wish you all the best.

It’s simply time to git!

of another.

“Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears.”

John Lennon

of sorts. Fueled by a proper amount of Bulleit. Too little wouldn’t have gotten me to this destination. Too much would have just muddied up the journey. I’m at the perfect depth, of that wonderful little rabbit hole I find myself in so often.

I’m not going to die a rich man, but I’ll not die a poor man either. I’ve become a member of a tribe that’s grown far too large. I should have been a member of one much smaller. One where each member had something to give to others. No payment other than what another member’s talent may have had to give in return. No money exchanged, just swapping talents. I’ll gather the food (for the vegans lol), the wood and build the fire for another to cook. You get the idea I hope.

Too small a group/tribe and there isn’t enough variety in talent to maintain the small but self sufficient group. Too many members, leads to repetition of talents which leads to competition, which in turn leads to greed, which leads to power and more greed! The very same domino effect that will be the end of everything all of us now know today.

I’m so effing sick of all of this greed and living a life chasing the almighty dollar. It’s not worth any of it!

Why is it that we are the only carbon based life form that requires a payment for existence? Why can’t we just be ‘beings’. All here for the other beings safety, comfort, existence?

If there was ever this utopia, could I be the distiller? The pondering story teller that went deep into the woods collecting the wood to help create comfortable abodes for others? I’d prefer not to be the hunter, just a gatherer that would be willing gleefully to share with others?

Words cut as sharp as the finest sword! Why? Why can’t I write stuff like this? I’ve thought it so many times before. Some say in a sentence what I’m incapable of saying in a week.

“But there ain’t much difference in the man I wanna be
And the man that I really am”.

Let’s change up that verse just a little.

“But there’s a whole lotta difference in the man I am
And the man I used to be, wanna be”.

Guess it’s time for me to pony up and write my own future vs hearing a version of it in another man’s works.

Oh and the tune that brought on these thoughts? Enjoy, it’s pretty spectacular!